Monday, January 19, 2009

Take a dumb pill.

We live in a world of pills.
Since a while I've been counting the number of pill commercials on TV. Hundreds! Erection problems? Take a pill. Depression?Take a pill. Allergies? Take a pill. and so on.

Having had depression when I was in my teenage years, I've had some experience with the "get well" pills. Let me tell you, they work! Oh yeah, they are great! I started taking them and I was happy all the time. The flip-side? They are legal recreational drugs. During the time I was on these pills, I noticed I never drew anymore. I never wrote, I never created anything.Now drawing has been my favorite leisure since I could hold a pencil. Drawing is my life and income since I'm a graphic designer. But I never drew so there was no money coming in either but I didn't care. I was on the "get well"pill.

I'm a thinker, I think all day long. Everyone thinks you'll tell me. No! I got thoughts like voices in my head. Constantly thinking about the future, trying to anticipate stuff, thinking about why our systems don't work and so on. But these pills, even when I wanted to think, nothing came. Zero. It was like a joint high, except I wasn't thinking about s#!^

You ask me, stress causes depression. The stress that comes from society enslaving you and not letting you live the live you dreamed of as a kid. In my case it was the lagoon. Let me clarify. As a kid I saw a movie called "The blue lagoon" and "The return to the blue lagoon". Since I was very young I wanted to get away from the corruption and filth that came with large societies having suffered many of their vices by adults. So when I saw these movies, I fell in love. I fell in love with the beach and the freedom that placed offered. But As I grew older, I still hadn't realized my dream of living in a place like that and it ate my alive. At the time I didn't realize that THAT was my problem so my parents sent me to a shrink. Take a pill she said. Take a pill and you'll feel better.

That's when I realized that the "chill pill" really existed. On that pill, I was never afraid, never down,never angry. I simply had no emotions. That a point that when I was on vacation, my mother called to inform me that robbers came to the house and beat my 70 yr old father. I simply couldn't feel anything. I loved my dad. But I simply couldn't feel anything!

They say that most diseases if not all start from not being at ease. Hence the word dis-ease. I think it's true. People are more and more enslaved in a capitalist system where they work their asses off in order to live up to the american dream; Leaving their families/husbands/wives for the last 10-15 minutes of the day between their daily jobs and sitcoms they watch before going to bed.

By the way when I wanted to stop taking the chill pill, I had the worst withdrawal symptoms ever. For about 3-4 months, everynight and I really mean everynight as in 120 nights, I had the most terrible nightmares ever.Look it up if you don't believe me. Google Paxil withdrawal.

So People of the system. Remember, when live gets too hard, Take a chill/paxil pill and dumb yourself down :)

2 comments:

  1. I like the way you write. Did you ever feel like your awareness was also the source of your misery? It's supposed to be a gift, I guess. I liken it to being a beautiful gazelle in a den of lions, suddenly possessing the ability to contemplate your imminent demise. That beauty and awareness is utterly pointless! Sometimes it's better not to know. That's where the doctors come in. Fortunately, I have a healthy suspicion of the medical industry.

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  2. I read somewhere that statistically close to 50% of Americans are on some form of anti-depressant. It is big business and rather than tell you to completely rearrange your life, they'll just prescribe you a pill to temporarily mask the problem. The medical industry is not in business to cure you. They are in business to prolong your sickness. Rather than turn yourself into a zombie, why not drop everything and move to an island?

    People will give all sorts of excuses why they can't, mostly out of fear and conditioning. Sometimes you just have to drop the routine and live your life for you and not for society, family, or whatever else dictates how you should live.

    Society plants this ideal image of what you should be, the so-called ideal Self, but reaching that image is impossible. So everyone lives their lives trying to resist simply what is and this creates enormous turmoil inside people. I understand why people want to take pills and relieve the pressure, but I ask again, why not simply just drop those things which cause turmoil and be silent for once?

    Keep writing.

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